I absolutely hate June 5th. And tomorrow will begin a phase of hating June 6th.
June 5th is the birthday of the sister I never got to meet. My only sister. Born lost, a stillborn. Gone 12 years before I ever came to be. I’ve always wanted a sister.
June 6th is the birthday of my maternal grandmother. She died April 6th of this year. And grieving is something I have not done well these last 2 months. Memories, both happy and sad, share the same weight of pain.
But, I lease a house tomorrow. Bittersweet I guess.
I’m distraught. Distressed. And I don’t know if I can go to my usual emotional supporter about anything right now. I’m having doubts.
Sigh. A day only lasts 24 hours at least.
I don’t feel like writing poetry or music right now. Maybe soon, I’ll have a poem worth salt.
That’s all I got right now.